Confessions of a Skinny Girl

I am a "skinny girl," whatever that means.*  I'm 5'3" and weigh about 108 pounds.  I've never been on a diet, not even after having my children. In fact, five months after giving birth to my third child I am back in my pre-pregnancy clothes with little or no effort.  I am the kind of woman other women hate, as I have been told many, many times in my life.  Because I'm petite, people tend to assume that I don't have body issues, that I'm comfortable in my own skin.  While almost every woman I know complains about her body issues to her friends, I am not allowed to do this.  In fact, if I say, "I don't like how I look in X,"  I am actually mocked.  I've been told by more than one good friend, "The skinny girl doesn't get to complain."  I, a "skinny" girl,  have some confessions to make. 

• I do have body issues, and I do want to talk about those issues with my friends.  
• Whenever someone says, "You look great, and I only hate you a little bit," my feelings are hurt.  
• "Skinny" girls aren't skinny because we want to make women who aren't "skinny" feel bad.
• Even though I don't diet, I do watch what I eat, and I do eat healthily.  
• I spend as much time thinking about food and my body as you do.
• I think I look awful in a bathing suit, and I'm not thrilled with the state of my abs.
• I don't think I'm skinny enough.

Here is the biggest confession of all:

• I have a skewed body image, as do most "skinny" girls.  Every time someone pays me a genuine compliment (and really, I feel like those are rare as most compliments include the statement "I hate you!" which I am meant to take as a joke), I think to myself, "Really, that person clearly doesn't see what I see. I think I could stand to lose a few pounds, and I really need to do more crunches."

So the next time you tell a "skinny" girl you hate her because of her size, think about how she feels about her own body first.

*I think this will be a series of posts.