In two weeks, Wild Man and Bear start school, Wild Man as a second grader and Bear as a Junior Kindergartener. That week George starts childcare full time, and my time as a stay-at-home mom officially ends (although it technically ended in May when my mat leave ended, George has only been in childcare part time, making me feel like I am still a stay-at-home mom in some ways). I'm feeling really conflicted about these impending changes.
On one level, I'm thoroughly enjoying watching my children flourish. Bear, in particular, has grown a lot this summer. In spite of some initial bumps, he has thrived in day camp. He has become much more independent, and Archer and I are both confident he will excel at kindergarten. Wild Man has proven to us that he is becoming a mature, responsible child. He has taken to the role of older sibling without hesitation, and he is increasingly asking for more responsibility. He loves looking out for his brothers (as much as he loves tormenting them, as is an older sibling's right, I suppose), and they have come to depend on him a great deal. George is settling into child care, and while he may be the most serious and observant of our children, he is slowly claiming a place for himself amongst the babies in his group. I'm proud of how they have adapted and their willingness to try to things. I think this speaks to mine and Archer's ability to instill confidence in them.
On another level, I'm sad that I won't be working from home most days, that I will be back to "balancing" work and home life. I'm sad that I can't just hang out at the park all day if I want to. I realize this will change. I know myself well enough to know that by next week I will be excited for the start of the school year, that I will be energized about my courses and new projects. But today, and likely for the next few days, I just want to hunker down with my boys and squeeze the last few moments out of the summer.
Showing posts with label summer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label summer. Show all posts
Monday, August 19, 2013
Tuesday, July 02, 2013
A rough morning
Today Wild Man and Bear started the first in a series of day camps. Wild Man was excited. He anticipated seeing old friends (he went to the same program last year), and he was really excited to make new friends. He happily put his lunch box in his back pack, let me put sunscreen on him, and climbed into the car. Bear, well, Bear was more hesitant. You see, to prepare him for JK, Archer and I decided to take him out of daycare (the same daycare he's been attending since he was 6 months old) and send him to day camp with Wild Man. We've been talking about this with him for months, and some days he is really excited. Other days, not so much.
Yesterday, Bear helped me label all his things, and he told me what he wanted in his lunch box. We made a special trip to the store so he could pick out containers that he can open easily. We discussed how he needed to make all his food last for both lunch and afternoon snack. Wild Man assured Bear that he would help him. We talked about how all the kids get to go swimming in the afternoon, and I showed him where I put his towel and suit. He said he didn't want to go swimming, and Archer assured him that was okay. I said, we'll tell your camp teacher. You can sit out and watch the other kids till you're more comfortable. He seemed okay with that. In fact, he seemed okay until we got to camp. Wild Man, who is our social guy, quickly found three kids he knew, and he found a spot where he could sit with Bear. He encouraged Bear to sit beside him, and he even offered to hold his hand. Bear, however, was having none of it. I literally had to peel him off of me. I took him to a quiet spot and reminded him that his teachers have my phone number and his dad's. I also reminded him that we're only 5 minutes away (the day camps are held on CU's campus) and that his dad was going to have lunch with them today. He told me that he didn't want to go and refused to let go of me. Finally, one of the teachers, a very nice young man, came over and introduced himself to Bear. He told Bear how much fun they were going to have, and then he took Bear from me, who started crying at that point. I hugged him one more time, and then Archer and I left. As we drove away, we saw Bear sitting in his teacher's lap trying not to cry, while Wild Man rubbed his back.
I'm struggling to get any work done this morning as I keep thinking about Bear. He does not handle new situations well, which is precisely why we wanted him to go to camp to prepare for JK. I hope that the day improves for him, and that he grows to like camp. I'm worrying about next Monday because the boys are in different programs starting next week. Really, I just want to go find my kid and hug him. I really hate it when I know I've made the right decision for my child, but that decision makes my child upset.
Yesterday, Bear helped me label all his things, and he told me what he wanted in his lunch box. We made a special trip to the store so he could pick out containers that he can open easily. We discussed how he needed to make all his food last for both lunch and afternoon snack. Wild Man assured Bear that he would help him. We talked about how all the kids get to go swimming in the afternoon, and I showed him where I put his towel and suit. He said he didn't want to go swimming, and Archer assured him that was okay. I said, we'll tell your camp teacher. You can sit out and watch the other kids till you're more comfortable. He seemed okay with that. In fact, he seemed okay until we got to camp. Wild Man, who is our social guy, quickly found three kids he knew, and he found a spot where he could sit with Bear. He encouraged Bear to sit beside him, and he even offered to hold his hand. Bear, however, was having none of it. I literally had to peel him off of me. I took him to a quiet spot and reminded him that his teachers have my phone number and his dad's. I also reminded him that we're only 5 minutes away (the day camps are held on CU's campus) and that his dad was going to have lunch with them today. He told me that he didn't want to go and refused to let go of me. Finally, one of the teachers, a very nice young man, came over and introduced himself to Bear. He told Bear how much fun they were going to have, and then he took Bear from me, who started crying at that point. I hugged him one more time, and then Archer and I left. As we drove away, we saw Bear sitting in his teacher's lap trying not to cry, while Wild Man rubbed his back.
I'm struggling to get any work done this morning as I keep thinking about Bear. He does not handle new situations well, which is precisely why we wanted him to go to camp to prepare for JK. I hope that the day improves for him, and that he grows to like camp. I'm worrying about next Monday because the boys are in different programs starting next week. Really, I just want to go find my kid and hug him. I really hate it when I know I've made the right decision for my child, but that decision makes my child upset.
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