This morning I got up early to get some work done, and before I started revising a new section, I checked my email. I had wonderful news awaiting me, let me tell you. It seems that CU has finally finalized the undergraduate budget for 2009-2010. Dr. Feminist emailed me late last night to find out if I could teach in the Spring rather than the Fall and to let me know the jobs would be posted soon (even though the course has been "promised" to me, I still have to apply for it). I emailed her back and told her that the switch wouldn't be a problem, and I then asked her if this meant that I wouldn't be getting one course each term. I told C about this on the way to school today, and he, of course, got stressed out. My teaching in the Fall had been the basis of our decision for him to take parental leave in the fall to be home with Z. If I'm not teaching, it may make more sense for me to take leave for more than just the summer, and then he could take leave in the Spring.
This creates somewhat of a financial mess for us, though. While C will get 95% of his pay, I will only receive 55% of mine because I'm only a part-time employee. This means our monthly income will drop by about $1,000, and that is the money that pays for Wild Man's school. If I don't teach in the Fall, we have to pull Wild Man out of school; there is absolutely no way around this, unless I am able to find a full-time job (which means I wouldn't be teaching). Frankly, the thought of going back to fundraising or grant writing makes me want to vomit. I loved both when I did them, but I didn't spend the last 6 years of my life in grad school, busting my ass to get my Ph.D. so I could go back to grant writing. I know that it would only be temporary, and I also know that since I've done it before I could do it again (assuming, of course, I could even find a job). But add to my extreme desire not to do it the fact that I'm having a baby in June. Doing something other than teaching would seriously limit the time I get with Z. I am fully aware how lucky I've been that my work, thus far, enables me to spend so much time with Wild Man. I never take that for granted. This is one of the reasons I like academia so much. Yes, we send him to daycare 4 days a week for 7 hours a day, but when he is home with us, one of us is always present. The very nature of our work makes that possible. I can't imagine working 40 hours a week and being away from a newborn for all that time. I can't. The thought of it makes me burst into tears (in fact, there I go again).
So for now, I continue to hope that by some miracle of miracles I will get part-time teaching in the fall in another department. I continue to hope that the head of the English department, who was so wonderful when I met him in December, proves to be as wonderful as I originally thought.
And somehow in the midst of all this crap, I keep working on my dissertation. . .
3 comments:
Sorry, M. I typed this comment in the wrong post:
Miracles happen everyday, my friend. I have every bit of confidence that everything will work out. Look at all that happened in the course of less than a year?
Yikes. Hopefully things will work out. I often find that just in my moment of need things click into place. Certainly you will be remembered for your flexibility. These things come back in unexpected ways.
Have you confirmed for sure that this means no fall class?
I have confirmed this, Profgrrrl. In fact, I explicitly asked Dr. Feminist this question. And she said, they simply don't have the funds to hire part-timers. CU is facing budget shortfalls everywhere, which are due more to the University's reaction to the world economy than the actual economic situation here.
And L, I knew where you meant to type the comment, and I appreciate the sentiment now matter where you put it!
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