A Conference

I attended a major conference in my field this past weekend (with thanks to Yetta and Pita, who stayed with Wild Man and Bear so that Archer could travel with George and me.  As an aside, that is officially a lot of pseudonyms for one sentence!).  It was really good to be back in the saddle, so to speak, and it was especially good to know that I did not have to rush home to get back to work.  You see, the thing I dislike about conferences is that I feel like I rarely have time to process all that I learn at a conference.  I am usually back in my office prepping classes, teaching, grading, writing, etc.  But this time I get to think about the panels I attended, the great ideas I heard, and how all of that affects me, my work, and my teaching.  I think I will be posting about this a bit in the next few weeks, but for now, I'll say that it was a good conference and I'm really glad I went.

My weekend away, and my baby is growing up

My weekend away went much better than I expected, especially given the fact that I did not want to go at all. In fact, I cried when I left because I really just wanted to stay home with C and Wild Man. In the end, I did enjoy myself. I attended some really great panels, including one on academic mothers that left me simultaneously excited and depressed. My own panel, which I had organized, went surprisingly well. I say surprisingly because it was scheduled at 8:30 on Sunday morning, the last day of the conference and the next to last panel. I was expecting no one to show up, which would have been fine b/c then I could have just chatted with my fellow panelists, who were very smart and offered some great suggestions for my paper. We had, however, about 16 people in the audience, and as no one went over time, we had 30 minutes for discussion. It was the best panel I've ever been a part of.

C and Wild Man had a relatively uneventful weekend with Yetta and Pita. There were no major melt-downs had by anyone, and Wild Man really enjoyed his time with his aunt, as he always does. C did, as I expected, get frustrated by Yetta and Pita's obsession with food, but there isn't much to be done about that. I arrived home to find my freezer and pantry stocked with all sorts of essentials, courtesy of Yetta, as well as a few things we will never eat that she determined were essential (pre-packaged cupcakes are, in fact, not essential for my life!). She also very generously bought Wild Man a mattress for the twin size bed that C and I recently bought him. She apparently spent quite a bit of money on all of us, despite C telling her that we're well able to buy these things ourselves. She finally told him to shut up and let her do it as she feels guilty for how much she does on a daily basis for his brother and his kids. So C shut up.

And last night, Wild Man slept in his "big boy" bed for the first time. Both Yetta and Pita wanted him to sleep in it while they were here, but C, who wanted to wait for me to get home, said Wild Man needed a bed rail first (which he did). I'm so glad he put them off and waited for me before he let Wild Man sleep in it the first time. I am happy I was here to mark that milestone with Wild Man. As it was, I cried as soon as I left his bedroom. If I hadn't been here the first time he slept in it, I know I would have cried more. C, who was experiencing the same sense of sadness and pride, said, "Our boy wears underwear, pees in the potty (mostly), and no longer sleep in his crib. He is definitely growing up. He isn't a baby anymore." Then, C leaned over and kissed my growing bump and said, "It's good we have another one on the way."

Conference Update

The conference went really, really well. I got a lot of great feedback about my paper and, thus, the concept that my entire dissertation is organized around. I feel really great about this as this was the first time I've discussed my work with people in my field who are not at my home institution. C and Wild Man did fine with out me, as I knew they would. In fact, I found it really insulting that so many people at the conference said to me "You left your son home alone with your husband; how is that going to work out?" I found this particularly insulting because we are supposedly enlightened academics. Granted this is a conference that is very welcoming of families, and I saw lots of men and women with their children. But I still don't like the assumption that fathers are incapable of caring for their own children for three days on their own. It was also really great to see my good friend, whom I haven't seen in over 7 months. We actually avoided lots of panels in favor of just chatting with each other, although we did go to a really interesting panel on Mommy Lit that I will likely blog about in detail in a few days.

I have lots of other things to say about what is going on in my life right now, but I'm not at the point where I can write about these things without getting more stressed out or emotional. So that's my update on my life: stressed out and emotional. How fun. . .

A little sick to my stomach

I'm presenting at a conference in April, and it is a conference I'm excited about for several reasons. First, I presented at it last year and found the audience to be really receptive to my ideas. My panel offered really great feedback, which will help me revise my paper if I ever get time to go back to it. Second, I proposed the panel that I am presenting with. I hand picked the people who are presenting with me, and they are all interested in topics that I am. I'm really excited to get to talk to these people. Third, one of my best friends is presenting at the conference, so she and I get the chance to catch up.

Despite all of this the act of purchasing my ticket, which I did today, has made me a little sick to my stomach. I will be away from Wild Man for at least two nights and possibly three. This is the first time I will have been away from him overnight since he was born. I know that C is perfectly capable, and I know they will be fine together on their own. In fact, I'm quite sure they will have fun without me. After all, Wild Man and I generally manage to have a good time when C has had to travel. I also know that I will get more out of the conference than I did last year when I had C and Wild Man in tow. But I know that some part of me will be a wreck without my boy, even for only two nights.

Some Good News!

I recently proposed a panel at a major conference, and it was accepted! The panel is on a topic very similar to the one of the current chapter I'm working on. Now I have definite motivation to get that chapter finished, so I can turn it into a conference paper fairly easily. I'm working on getting motivated as well. Despite all the stress of last week, I did manage to get three more books read and my syllabus for my summer course, which I start teaching next week, finished. I haven't gotten much writing done, but I am putting myself on a strict time schedule when S and I get back from our trip to visit my grandparents. I want to have 20 pages written by the end of July, which I think is manageable. I know I still have a lot to read before I can finish the chapter I'm working on, but I want to start writing more.