One of my very best friends in the world--a person who has been my friend since 5th grade and is the only person from high school that I go out of my way to keep up with--is getting married in October. This person, whom I'll call Prudence (a reference she'll get, I think), was my maid-of-honor when Archer and I got married, so there is absolutely no way I am missing this wedding. That said, the wedding is in a hard-to-get-to location, and it will take place in the middle of the fall semester, both of which make it difficult and expensive for our entire family to go. Originally we had planned that I would go by myself while Archer stayed home with the boys. After some investigating, I discovered that it wouldn't be terribly expensive for Archer to come with me, provided we could find someone to stay with the boys for about 4 days. So I mentioned this to him. He loved the idea--especially since we haven't had a night alone together since Wild Man was born almost 5 years ago. We discussed our options for childcare, which are somewhat limited. We decided, against my own reservations, that Pita and Yetta were the best choice, so we asked them if they would come up to CU Land to care for the boys so we could go to the wedding. They immediately agreed, provided Pita could get the time off of work. Archer and I began making tentative plans to attend the wedding. The plans, however, have gotten increasingly complicated. And to be honest, I don't know why I'm surprised as everything involving Yetta and Pita gets complicated.
In the past 5 days, Yetta has called every single day to ask us when the wedding is (you know, because Prudence and her fiance change the date every 5 minutes), how long we'll be gone, and when we need them here. Whatever. I can handle this mainly because I'm not the one on the phone with her. Apparently she called Archer earlier this morning to ask one more question: "Is there anyway you could come to Home State first and leave the boys here with us?" Um, how in the hell would that work? The wedding is in, as I said, an out of the way location, so doing this would necessitate that we buy 4 plane tickets to Home State, drop the boys off, and then, having purchased 2 tickets to the wedding location, fly there. Then we'd have to do the exact reverse--all in 4 days. Plus, we'd have to pull Wild Man out of school and haul all of their stuff to Home State. I mean, seriously, on what planet is this even practical?
Why would Yetta ask if this was possible? Well, she is likely more comfortable in her own home than in ours, and it also seems that she is not sure Pita can get the time off. So she wants to ensure we are able to go to the wedding, and in her mind, bringing the boys to her makes the most sense. And no, she will not come take care of the boys on her own--we wouldn't even ask her because we don't think she's physically up to it. Archer just suggested asking my mom, who would happily come and could (more or less) manage it, except she refuses to drive in CU Land. Thus, the boys would be trapped in the house with her for 4 days, and Wild Man would still miss school.
Really, I just want to go to Prudence's wedding--with my husband. Is that too much to ask? Is it wrong to hire Bear's teacher, our go-to babysitter, for 4 days?
7 comments:
If you have a good babysitter who you trust, I think it would definitely be okay to hire her so you guys can go have some grown-up fun!
Just hire the baby sitter and have your close friends in town come see the boys every day for a bit and you'll be fine!! It's too much stress to get your in-laws to help, seriously.
What they said! But then this is from the girl who'd never hire her in-laws to watch anyone's kids. You're going to be away, which scenario will allow you to relax at the wedding?
Once they got here, I would be comfortable (more or less) with Yetta and Pita caring for the boys. Wild Man is unfailingly honest, and he has, in the past, told Archer and me things that Pita has said, which were incredibly inappropriate. We have both questioned Pita about these things, and she has stopped saying things like this in front of our kids. And I do believe this to be the case rather than her saying things and then telling Wild Man not to tell us because Wild Man would say something like, "Pita said something that I'm not supposed to talk to you about."
That said, I'd be more comfortable with our go-to babysitter, but this seems like a lot to ask of a babysitter. She'd have to take Wild Man to kindergarten and pick him up, as well as stay the night at our house. I mean, what do you even offer to pay someone for doing something like this?
Our cat sitter spends the night at our house...well she did where we lived. Plus she'd stop by mid-day. (yeah, I have high-need pets.) I just asked around what others paid for such services. I don't know the going rate for babysitting, but I'd offer a little more, because of spending the night. And then find out some foods she likes, etc and leave that at the house as an extra way to make her more comfortable.
We paid $20 a day for the cat sitter. Steep, maybe, but they were well cared for and they loved her. Captain stresses so easily and stress can lead to a vet visit and medicine. Never had a problem with her. Like I said, I don't know what the price is for child care, but in our case we couldn't put a price on knowing we could be gone all week and our cats would be taken care of and no vet visits! Oh yeah, a few times she cleaned (we never asked her to) and I'd pay a little extra for that.
We pay our babysitter $10 an hour, so an evening out can run us anywhere from $40 to $50. Obviously b/c of daycare she wouldn't be with the boys 24/7, but she would have them on the weekend. I was thinking $100 a day.
That seems reasonble, provided it's not a financial burden on you.
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