A conversation with my father

I was originally going to post this on the other blob in which I participate, The Rhetorical Situation, but as it verges into the personal at times, I decided to post it here.

Sunday is the day I talk to my parents. I occasionally chat with my mom during the week, but for whatever reason, I usually only talk to my dad on Sunday. Lately the conversation has been rather mundane, almost to the point that I'm annoyed when we talk. This past Sunday, however, my dad surprised me by asking my opinion on something. He asked me why Democrats dislike Sarah Palin so much. This question took me off guard for several reasons. First, my dad and I avoid talking politics because when we do talk politics we usually end up yelling at each other. Second, my dad made it clear that he was only asking for information; he didn't want to get into a political debate. Rather, he wanted to understand some of the things being said about Palin. I tried, the best I could, to explain that I couldn't offer an opinion for all Democrats, so I tried to articulate why I think Palin is a bad choice for VP, without going into why I will not be voting for McCain. I told him that Palin is inarticulate, inexperienced, and ignorant about many things. I also said that I think McCain was pandering to women by choosing her. My dad then asked "But why are Gloria Steinem and NOW so anti-Palin? Don't feminists support all women?" I think my dad asked a question that a lot of Americans are also asking themselves, so I tried to explain, again from my perspective, as best I could. I said, yes, in theory, feminism is about improving life for all women. But Palin isn't representative of most American women. In fact Palin's situation is sort of unique. She is a working mother who has a supportive spouse and a network of family around to help her. Further, I said, her policies, and Republican policies in general, aren't supportive of women. He seemed to understand this, and we had a really good conversation without any yelling.

The conversation prompted me to consider how it is that my dad, a former self-proclaimed "flower child" who dropped acid, smoked pot, and wore his hair long, could become so conservative. It also made me wonder yet again how our politics can be so different. My dad is liberal socially (he supports gay marriage and a woman's right to choose), but he is very conservative in terms of crime and defense (and he, unfortunately, tends to vote for people who are equally conservative in those areas, negating his social liberalism). I can't account for all of my dad's conservative beliefs (although I do think his decision to join the military in the early 1970s profoundly affected his "hippie" views), but I do know that he has become increasingly conservative about military matters since September 11th. My dad is a firefighter, and he was profoundly affected by the number of firefighters killed on September 11th. Since that time he's become increasingly conservative and willing to follow our military leaders into any war that will ensure that the individuals responsible for September 11th are brought to justice. His brand of justice, needless to say, is vastly different from my own. Recently, however, my dad has begun to make some statements that lead me to think he is not so sure the Iraq War, of which he was once an ardent supporter, was the best idea. He has been out of the military for some time, but he continued to work in a military fire department, as a civil service firefighter, until he retired last year. I know several of the young GIs he worked with are currently on their second tour in Iraq, and one come home severely injured from fighting a fire caused by a bombing. I don't know if this accounts for his change or not, but I do know he seems to be rethinking some of his positions.

Given this I was more than a bit surprised to have a fairly open conversation with my dad regarding the current Presidential campaign. I don't think my dad will suddenly change his mind and vote Democrat, but the conversation does give me hope that maybe, just maybe the tide is changing in the U.S.